Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
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