sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
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