Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
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can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
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