hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
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