I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
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