there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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