I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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