Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
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