Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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