you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
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