I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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