3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
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