Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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