New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize