Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I got inside last night via doggy door
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize