I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
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