I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
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I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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