walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
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