I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize