no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
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