That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
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