i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize