my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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