drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Randomize