True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
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