I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
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