the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
They are going to name an STD after you.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
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