We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize