Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
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My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
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You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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