I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
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That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
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It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize