Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
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he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
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If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
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