i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I don't think brook has ever known best
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Randomize