Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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