She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize