ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I feel great
I just peed on a car
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
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I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
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I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
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