I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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