That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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