I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
That was an excessively violent trivia night
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize