What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
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If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
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No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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