Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize