So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Randomize