i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I licked your asshole in confidence.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
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