I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
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