My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize