By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize