why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
i think i just lost a toe
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize