Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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