I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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