Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Randomize