Dual....:-)
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize